ben.parmeter

I tend to post updates here on this blog in a flurry, when I have a free moment to steal away from the madness.  When I’m not working, I’m here at home, either working (sadly) or bouncing Claire or taking care of a random chore while Suzy bounces Claire.  Well, today, I grabbed a few moments to finish posting pictures from Christmas in Oregon in 2009.  Dang.  That only took a month.

Yes, yes, I know.  I’ve been busy, OK?  Forgive me?  Ok, thanks for letting me off the hook this time.  I managed to squeeze some blog time into weekend amongst bouncing with Claire, doing some home improvement, cleaning the house, and doing catch-up California Christmas.  At any rate, I’m still sorting through all of the Oregon photos.  But just to give you a taste, I’ve uploaded some photos into a gallery which I will categorize as mid-December, pre-Christmas photos.  As written about by my older(wiser) sister, the holidays were filled with “Awesome Times, and Awesome People”.  More about that later.  On to the photos…

Welcome back from vacation, internet.  I hope you all had a great weekend.  Suzy and I just came back from a fun-packed, all-American weekend.  We stayed in a cabin out on the Owens River, near Bishop, CA.  Our friends family owns the cabin and the amazing ranch that it sits on.  And they were super-kind to invite us and quite a few other friends to crash their ranch over the fourth of July weekend, free of charge.  It truly was an uniquely American event with high desert fun including horse shoes, skeet shooting, barbecues, fireworks, beer, fly-fishing, etc…

Photo’s of the festivities can be found in the gallery as usual, or simply click this link.

Erik and Kristi, Howard and Linda – Thanks for giving us an unforgettable fourth of July!

Happy fathers day everyone. Kinda feels like this day was created just so dads wouldn’t feel left out of the whole mothers day thing. But dads surely do deserve a day to be revered as well. I love ya Dad, and I hope I can do as good a job at raising my child as you did with us kids.

As a celebration of fathers day and of my own impending parenthood, I’m posting some videos from our most recent ultrasound. This was the appointment where we found out that little Gizmo was going to be a girl. I have to say that it was a pretty awe inspiring experience to see my little progeny-to-be fluttering around inside my wife.

Since YouTube only allows ten minute videos, I had to cut this up into two parts. And no comments about the music, this was all part of the “experience” that we received at the place we had the ultra-sound done.  This was done right around week 17 of the pregnancy, so Gizmo still looks like an alien monkey.  Frankly, a bit creepy.  But also cute and awesome at the same time.  (Gizmo – I’m sorry, in advance, for posting a video with your naughty bits all over the internet – it’s really hard to see them anyway.  Some day you will will understand)

Happy Valentines Day everyone! Not to be a big downer or anything, but this holiday feels cheapened by the mass commercialization of candy, greeting cards, etc.   The amount of e-mail spam I’ve received for pajama-grams, flowers-over-the-internet, and penis enlargement have really spiked over the last week.  The marketing geniuses of the world are cramming this holiday down my throat everywhere I turn.

But hey, there is a really good side to this day.  It reminds us to express our love for each other and creates a socially acceptable forum for men (and women) to show their sensitive sides.  Really, we should be letting our significant others know how much we love them all year long.  But this holiday is a welcome platform to affirm just how much we care for one another.

And you know what else, it makes great economic sense.  What better stimulus is there for a country in economic crisis than to celebrate holidays that involve spending lots and lots of money on flowers, candy, expensive restaurants, hotels, gasoline, greeting cards, sexy underwear, jewelry, teddy bears, etc.  It really is like an emergency Christmas!

Wikipedia says “The The U.S. Greeting Card Association estimates that approximately one billion valentines are sent each year worldwide, making the day the second largest card-sending holiday of the year, behind Christmas.” Wow.

So, go out and spend your money with wild abandon and do your part in this crisis.  All of this is a great segue into this clip of John Hodgman from the Daily Show last week.  I found it to be downright hilarious.  Embedded here for your viewing enjoyment.

It was around 9:40PM when we got the call at the house.  Suzy and I, and my parents-in-law were all enjoying a late dinner on Christmas Eve at their home.  Warm and comfortable, sipping mulled wine, we were interrupted by the ringing phone.  The phone call was for my father-in-law (we’ll call him ‘Dan’ to protect his identity), who works at a nearby grocery store as the head clerk.  It was the alarm company that monitors the security system for the grocery store.  Apparently, the entrance door sensors had been tripped, somehow.  According to Dan, this is not uncommon to have false alarms at the store.  And so we decided to put our jackets and shoes on and head over to the store to investigate (I offered to tag along so that he wasn’t alone).

Within minutes, we were slowly driving past the front doors of the building, looking for any abnormalities.  It was then, when we spotted that indeed the southeast automatic doors were slightly open, maybe an inch or so.  Dan remarked that he had locked the secured the doors himself, and this was definitely not normal.  We parked and walked up to the front of the store.  As we strolled up to the doors, the local police were also starting to arrive.  Without touching the door, we notice that the latch mechanism appeared to be intact, but the door itself appeared to be damaged.  It seemed if someone had pried the doors apart.  But why had they left the doors closed?  Did they go inside or were they deterred by the security monitors that are clearly displayed in the front of the store?  Instead of investigating any more, we decided it would be safest for the police to do a sweep of the store to make sure that the criminals weren’t still inside.  As more policemen arrived, and a K-9 unit, they finally began a sweep of the store.  I found all of this extremely fascinating and the adrenaline was coursing through my veins.   I barely noticed the cold air of the night as I stood, riveted, watching the police sweep the building.

After about thirty minutes, the police emerged from the front door, after clearing the store.  It seems the would-be thieves were long gone.  Dan spoke to his manager on the cell phone and subsequently to the police giving a report of the times that the store was closed and when the alarm was tripped.  The police evidence officer was on his way, as well as the loss prevention team from the store’s corporate office.

We decided to enter the building and see if we could determine what the robbers had done inside the store.  I strolled in after Dan and the police officers and started looking around for anything out of place.  The first thing we noticed was the self-check registers.  They had been opened and all cash removed at closing time, due to a corporate policy.  The doors on the machine were wide open, displaying the machinery inside.  The intent was that if any robbers did break into the store, they would not damage the machine trying to get into the cash trays.  This policy paid off for the store this night, as the robbers had removed two of the cash trays before realizing that they were empty leaving them splayed on the floor.  As we scanned the row of registers, nothing seemed amiss, until I came upon the first register which had the entire cash drawer ripped from the counter, and lay unopened on the floor.

It was at this time when the loss-prevention team arrived at the store to assess the situation.  We showed them the damage to the door and the registers.  And to my joy, they allowed us to follow them up to the security room where they had a row of monitors and three large digital video recorders.  I was in awe of the technology in the room.  It was surveillance that would make even a Vegas casino blush.  Well, maybe I’m getting a little carried away.  But it was very impressive to a novice.  The clarity of the digital video was superb and the amount of cameras and angles covered was mind boggling.  Based on the time the alarm was tripped, we were able to dial back the video at an instant to the approximate time of the break-in.  And very quickly they were able to locate the precise moment that a blue sports car pulled up and deposited two masked men in front of the store.

These guys knew exactly what they were doing.  We watched as the two thieves sauntered up to the front of the store with a crowbar in hand.  They popped the doors open with surprising ease with one swift move.  As they pushed the doors open and stepped inside, we could see that they were wearing black ski-masks which covered their nose and mouths, obscuring their identity.  They also wore gloves which would prevent the evidence officer, who was fastidiously dusting for prints at this very moment, from finding any fingerprints of the robbers.  Smartly, the sports car which dropped them off also sped away.  The loss prevention guy who was working the security systems, said “Maybe we can get this guy’s license plates with the outside camera”.  His fingers moved deftly over the controls as he brought up different angles of the outside.  Dialing back a few seconds, the main camera out in front of the building just misses the plates on the car.  However, interestingly the burglars getaway car driver was very shrewd and drove off into the distance facing the store with headlights on obscuring any chance of the cameras catching the plates.  Hopes dashed, the loss prevention guy tried to dial back the tape before the crime occurred to see if the same car could be seen in the parking lot.  Sure enough, about five minutes prior, the same car looped around the building, casing the joint.  This time it was close enough to get a good view – there may still be a chance they could get the plate numbers.

We continued to watch the video of the robbers as the walked into the store and with the focus of trained criminals, went straight for the self-checkout machines.  Since the machines were already open, they easily grabbed the money trays from the cabinets underneath the machine.  They quickly realized the trays were empty and then moved along to the cash register.   One of the thieves ripped the cash drawer from under the counter.  With the locked drawer on the floor, he used the crowbar to attempt to bend open the locking mechanism.  Either thwarted by the lock or after discovering the drawer was empty he gave up and both thieves casually walked back to the same door that they had previously pried open.  Surprisingly, they made sure the door was as closed as possible before dashing around the back of the building to meet up with the getaway car.  What a couple of gentleman.  The “Gentleman Robbers”, I will call them.  They were in and out of the store within 90 seconds, and though empty handed were focused and professional while doing their work.

And after fixing the lock and securing the store we called it a night and headed back home.  The adrenaline was starting to wear off and after another mug of mulled wine we retired to bed and slept so as to allow Santa to come, breach our security and deposit some gifts under the tree.  I will not soon forget this Christmas Eve.  It was exciting and saddening at the same time.

Happy holidays and a merry Christmas to all! We sincerely hope that today you are happy, healthy and are with your loved ones.

With love,

Ben and Suzy

P.S.  Stay tuned for details about our adventure on Christmas Eve which involved six policemen, a police dog, and robbers!

Finally, the music websites that I frequent are starting to eke out the “best of 2008″ lists.  Pitchfork silently rolled out their top 100 albums of 2008.   And my favorite on-line radio station Woxy.com finally released their 97 best of 2008.  They also released their DJ’s fav albums of 2008 which I found more interesting, because I typically agree with Matt Shiv’s list.  This year, maybe not so much.  But I did obtain copies of Mason Proper and Ra Ra Riot’s latest albums and I must say I was pleasantly surprised.  Too bad I missed these when they were released.  Hey, better late than never.

In other news, look, someone else cares about the light bulb issue that I previously ranted about.  Looks like LEDs are going to take us by storm.  Please, please, please provide me with cheap LED lights now, Mr. Free-Market.  This article tends to a have a flair for the dramatic saying “…what could be termed a benevolent tsunami, an irresistible wave, a solution to many global challenges currently faced by humanity…“  Let’s hope so.

Driving home from soccer this morning, I noticed that someone had a bumper sticker that said “Dissent is Patriotic in a Democracy”.  And it got me to thinking, while I whole heartedly agree that dissent is healthy to our nation, we are technically not a Democracy in the classic sense.  Did you know that?  (or was I the only one asleep in my 10th grade social studies class?)  Did I just blow your mind?   Here in the United States of America we have a constitutional republic.  Still some would argue that we still live largely a democratic system.  Anyway, the author of that bumper sticker probably lived in ancient Greece where they had a true direct Democracy, yeah, that’s what it probably was.  And… discuss.

I kegged a beer for the first time this weekend.  The process took me less than an hour and was far, far easier than bottling.  I’m still a bit iffy about the whole force carbonation thing – I mean, not having done it before I’m struggling with the physics of it.  I mean, really?  You can just hook up CO2 to a sealed keg of flat beer and it will just carbonate?  Well, apparently yes – and apparently there is all kinds of cool sceince behind this too.  The colder the beer, the better it will absorb the CO2.   And for different types of beer, there are different temperatures pressures to set your rig to, to achieve that perfect level of carbonation.  And after about 2-3 days it’s supposed to achieve good “lamination” where the CO2 literally is layered in the beer so that it doesn’t go immediately flat after dispensing.  This hobby really does blend together two outstanding things, science and delicious beer.  Can it get any better than that?

Speaking of science, our president-elect and savior, is establishing a stronger scientific team – breaking from the Bush tradition.   Quote “The president-elect warned that promoting science is “about ensuring that facts and evidence are never twisted or obscured by politics or ideology,” an apparent reference to the Bush administration’s response to research on global warming.”  This makes me really excited for the future of this country.   Thank goodness we have someone that will be making good, scientifically sound, intelligent decisions for this country.  And even before he takes office!   What a super guy.

I was the lucky recipient of a “Magic Tree” which I obtained recently at Holiday White Elephant gift exchange.  I decided to grow the magic tree and do a photo essay of the results.  Here are the results, enjoy.

Click the first image and navigate through to the end.

Verdict: Magic Tree = Awesome.  Not 100% as awesome as the packaging makes it out to be, but still pretty darned cool.  We’ll give it another day to see if it can achieve the luster of the tree pictured on the package.

Ok, so I know that you don’t like sappy Hallmark cards, nor do you like any cards at all. They’re expensive and usually quite wasteful. Let’s compromise, and instead I’ll write down my sentiments here – all oohey gooey and extra syrupy for the internet to see. To my wife, here it is, 101 reasons why I love you:

1. I love your persistence.

2. I love the way I know you’ll never give up on me.

3. I love the fact that I wouldn’t ever give up on you.

4. I love the way you look at me.

5. I love how beautiful your eyes are.

6. I love the way I can’t imagine a day without you in my life.

7. I love the way if we were ever separated I wouldn’t know how to go on.

8. I love the way we cuddle.

9. I love the way we finish each other’s sentences.

10. I love how I know you’ll always be there when I need you to be.

11. I love the fact that I will always be there for you too.

12. I love how when I dream of my life partner, the only person that I can see is you.

13. I love how complete I feel when I am with you.

14. I love how we just fit together.

15. I love the way you make me laugh.

16. I love the way you laugh.

17. I love the way you won’t compromise yourself when we are together.

18. I love the way you won’t let me compromise myself.

19. I love your thoughtfulness.

20. I love your tenderness.

21. I love your ability to speak without saying a single word.

22. I love the way we glance at each other across the room and know what each other is thinking.

23. I love the way, how even though we may be miles apart I still feel like you’re right here with me.

24. I love the way you surprise me with the perfect gifts that show you pay attention to me.

25. I love that you enjoy video games as much as the boys do.

26. I love the way you are with my friends.

27. I love your love for the things that interest me.

28. I love the way you let me live my life freely without jealousy.

29. I love how you demand respect but are not controlling.

30. I love how I would do anything in this world to make you happy.

31. I love how you would do anything in this world to make me happy.

32. I love the way your voice sounds over the phone.

33. I love the way your voice sounds when you whisper sweet nothings in my ear.

34. I love breakfast with you in the morning.

35. I love your sensuality.

36. I love how our romance feels like it’s uniquely ours.

37. I love how you are my soul mate.

38. I love the way you handle troubled times.

39. I love the way you respect me.

40. I love the way you protect and defend me.

41. I love how you feel when we cuddle.

42. I love the softness of your lips against mine.

43. I love when you let me eat those unhealthy things, and share them with me.

44. I love when you don’t let me eat those unhealthy things and make me share a salad with you.

45. I love laying in bed at night talking about nothing. (believe it or not)

46. I love waking up to find we’ve been cuddling together.

47. I love the surprises you leave for me.

48. I love your intelligence.

49. I love your ingenuity.

50. I love your ability to make friends where ever we go.

51. I love your phone phobia.

52. I love your passion your career.

53. I love how every time I look at you, you take my breath away.

54. I love how I thank Norlock everyday for bringing someone as wonderful as you into my life.

55. I love that we share our food.

56. I love the special moments that we shared that will remain my fondest memories of you and I.

57. I love spending the holidays with the one person I love the most.

58. I love how my heart skips a beat whenever you walk into the room.

59. I love how you love me.

60. I love how I love you.

61. I love the ways you choose to show your affection for me.

62. I love the way you inspire me to be more than I am.

63. I love the way you spark my creativity and imagination.

64. I love the way you make me feel like anything is possible as long as I’m with you.

65. I love your sense of humor.

66. I love the way you make me feel like royalty.

67. I love the way you dress.

68. I love your understated elegance.

69. I love you just the way you are.

70. I love your spontaneity.

71. I love our life together.

72. I love how if I died right now I would be the happiest person alive knowing I found my one true love.

73. I love the fact that we will grow old together.

74. I love your way with words.

75. I love the way you look when your sleeping. (even if it creeps you out)

76. I love the way you think you look awful when you first wake up when it is actually then I find you the most beautiful.

77. I love your willingness to share everything and most especially your heart with me.

78. I love your strength of character.

79. I love taking walks together

80. I love the way you leave me love notes in my luggage when I go on business trips.

81. I love the way you treat me.

82. I love the way you take care of us.

83. I love your cooking.

84. I love the way you take the time to thank me for doing every day things.

85. I love the way you show your affection when we are around friends and/or family.

86. I love the way you are not scared to show your affection when we are in public.

87. I love your confidence.

88. I love your ability to make me feel better when times are tough.

89. I love the way we make up after a fight.

90. I love that you love gadgets.

91. I love the way you support me when I’m off track.

92. I love the way you take the time to show me how much you love me.

93. I love your amazing hair.

94. I love your amazing body.

95. I love your openness to try new things.

96. I love your ability to talk things through.

97. I love your courage to be you.

98. I love your greatness.

99. I love the fact that you want to be with me and only me.

100. I love how I am and feel when I am with you!

101. I love you for you!

In the interest of full disclosure, I did get help from the internet for this list. But it doesn’t make it any less true!